On February 24th, 2022, Russia launched its unprovoked, brutal invasion of Ukraine. In an instant, millions saw their lives shattered - plunged into a crucible of trauma, loss, and gut-wrenching moral injury from which most of them will never fully heal.
For those defending on the front lines, each day brings the starkest horrors. Death skulks are omnipresent amid the relentless barrage of missiles and gunfire. For many, buried trauma compounds with each battle as they witness relentless devastation and lose comrades-in-arms... like our cousins... my brother... Their unwavering resolve comes at a profound cost - invisible scars carved into their psyche that no medal of bravery can erase... although they quite many of them...
Behind the lines, families see normalcy evaporate overnight. As missiles and kamikaze drones rain down and occupiers terrorize, they flee for their lives or cower in makeshift shelters praying for reunification, terrified their missing loved ones may never return. The sheer scope of loss - homes, belongings, community, security, identity - claws at their foundation, threatening to consume all semblance of hope...
And everywhere - malice, cruelty, devastation without end. All darker for its wanton malevolence and complete absence of meaning... and because there is no understanding of how and when the war will end, the darkness takes over and over more and more... shared darkness...
We, theological educators-volunteers, dwell in the crucible, striving to ease those drowning in despair however we can. We aid displaced families robbed of all security, homesick soldiers defending foreign turf, and communities struggling without basic amenities...
Our spirits also plunge into the darkness when choosing to immerse in their suffering. We are not obligated. But we chose to step in... Without consulting with you... Because it is our blood and our shared darkness... our way of following the Mission that ... that has not changed...
The scale of trauma defies all attempts at comfort. No reassuring word or compassionate act can restore all that was lost. It is not your fault... it is our fault... to be at this particular time and specific location of History... it is His will that allowed (why?!) all "these" to happen... We share with our soldiers and broken civilians in the abyss of shared anguish... our very souls screaming out against injustice and searching for meaning amid such senseless ongoing devastation... by the war... by the corruption...
Yet our shared shining darkness also forges a profound connection. Just as we strive to light candles of hope for those on the brink, so too do our partners - you - illuminate our paths. Your solidarity renews our stamina when exhaustion looms. This interdependence makes space for light even when numb desolation threatens to consume all capacity for our human emotion...
And so often, our shared darkness reveals life's essence, too. A displaced mother, trembling as she recounts losing her home and husband to aerial bombardment, whispers almost in surprise, "Now that everything's been taken, I realize what truly matters." At that moment, staring into the void strips all else away, laying life's most profound truths bare... The truth of the shining Darkness of God...
The crucible, harsh as it sears, makes space for revealing life's bedrock. And there, etched into our very marrow, an unwavering conviction flickers through the dark. No matter what is taken, no one can extinguish each soul's intrinsic dignity and worth... We can break and give them away... someday... but no one can take it from us... in our shared darkness...
Elie Weisel, in his "Night," being a victim of humanity's most twisted atrocities, unearthed this bedrock truth even in the death camps where millions perished. "Never shall I forget that night, the first night in camp, which has turned my life into one long night, seven times cursed and seven times sealed Never shall I forget those moments which murdered my God and my soul and turned my dreams to dust. Never shall I forget these things, even if I am condemned to live as long as God Himself," - he wrote, chronicling a journey through every circle of hell. - "No one may speak for the dead, no one may interpret their mutilated dreams and visions... I speak from experience that even in darkness, it is possible to create light and encourage compassion. There it is: I still believe in man in spite of man."
Weisel's words reflect a revelation many Ukrainians describe, too. Ground to dust, we unearth an ember burning steadfast, however dim - that no outside force can extinguish our soul's intrinsic connection to the Eternal...
This foolish, dangerous, childish (in your eyes?) trust is perhaps what hope is built upon in the end in our shared darkness... The decision to love through hate destroys us to the ground, but.... it encroaches. To see God's image in even the most broken souls... And to nurture that divine spark within and between us even as malicious forces conspire to snuff it out...
The shared darkness of trauma will surely leave scars on Ukraine's psyche for generations... and on you, too... on those of you who chose to step in with us into the Valley of Shared Death and Darkness... Yet somehow, even with life at its bleakest, the human spirit chooses resilience. Out of rubble, hands reach to comfort the bereaved and rebuild shattered neighborhoods. Exhausted soldiers somehow emerge from night skirmishes, ready to defend our homeland again at dawn, not because they deny the darkness but because love for family and nation burns brighter still... despite the corruption...
Laying in the rubble is a child's toy... Next to it, a single flower bud pushing up through broken concrete... Signs of life determined to bloom even here...
The shared darkness will long touch Ukraine in the aftermath of the war and, in memory, seared into our identity... But flowers can grow in graveyards, too... Have you ever witnessed the flowers in graveyards, friends? Individual souls can heal through compassion's salve. And national psyches, when faced with unthinkable trauma, somehow can choose resilience time and again... through and by shared shining darkness...
Herein lies the paradox of shining darkness - that even as bullets fly and missiles and drones drop, an undying conviction pulses in each soul and between those united: no outside force holds power significant enough to sever our intrinsic bonds to one another in our shared darkness... and the Eternal Light that binds every living being across time and space. Not in life, not in death, not ever...
Standing together, may we carry this light for each other through our shared darkness... And when trauma threatens all capacity for hope and love, may we nurture the seeds of wisdom planted in our hearts before time becomes time... In life's marrow, an unshakeable knowing carries us forward even through the deepest night: no shared darkness lasts forever. Dawn always comes... even through the strongholds of the shared darkness... Will we... will you... have enough patience with us? Will you? We wish you and your families peace and Silent Night... not the shared darkness visible through the broken windows of our souls...
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Taras N. Dyatlik, Ukraine
645 days of the ongoing full-scale war
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Photo: early May 2022, Borodyanka
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Taras N. Dyatlik, Ukraine
645 days of the ongoing full-scale war
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Photo: early May 2022, Borodyanka
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